True Answers About Retirement

Question: How many days are there in a week?

Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday


Question: When is a retiree’s bedtime?

Answer: Two hours after he falls asleep on the couch.


Question: How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.


Question: What’s the biggest gripe of retirees?

Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.


Question: Why don’t retirees mind being called Seniors?

Answer: The term comes with a 20% discount.


Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?

Answer: Idiot


Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?

Answer: Lunch.


Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?

Answer: The never-ending coffee break.


Question: What’s the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?

Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.


Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn’t miss work, but misses the people he used to work with? Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.


Question: What do you do all week?

Answer: Monday through Friday, nothing; Saturday & Sunday, I rest.

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