Military Humor 2

Smart bombs have bad days, too.


Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.


The difficult we do immediately; the impossible takes a little while longer.


The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.


Any ship can be a minesweeper… once


Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.


There are three types of intelligence: the intelligence of man, the intelligence of animals and the intelligence of the military… in that order.


Funny military quotes and proverbs


“Do not touch anything unnecessarily. Beware of pretty girls in dance halls and parks who may be spies, as well as bicycles, revolvers, uniforms, arms, dead horses, and men lying on roads — they are not there accidentally.”

Soviet infantry manual, issued in the 1930’s


One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine, is that the Americans do not read their manuals, nor do they feel any obligation to follow their doctrine…

– From a Soviet Junior Lt’s Notebook


“The best tank terrain is that without anti-tank weapons.”

-Russian military doctrine.

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