Wives want to videotape the birth of their child, while husbands want to videotape the conception.


What is the ideal marriage? One between a deaf man and a blind woman


There are 4 rings men need for marriage – The first is an engagement ring, then a wedding ring, then suffe-ring and endu-ring.


If at first you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0.


He who laughs last thinks slowest


You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving, you know… You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.


Life is like a box of chocolates… mostly disappointing.


What is the main difference between men and boys? Men’s toys cost more.


A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.


When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite, they only look at the other 10%.


If at first you don’t succeed, try twice more so your failure is statistically significant.


What’s the difference between love and marriage? Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.

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