Always pretend to know more than everybody around you.
Get employees to fill in time sheets.
Run daily checks on progress of everyone’s work.
Ensure that highly qualified people do mundane work for long periods.
Put barriers up between departments.
Don’t speak personally to employees, except when announcing increased targets, shortened deadlines and tightened cost restraints.
Ask for a 200-page document to justify every new idea.
Call lots of meetings.
Place the biggest emphasis on the budget.
Buy lots of computers.
*****
Funny newspaper headlines
Couple slain; police suspect homicide
Kids make nutritious snacks
County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds
Utah Poison Center reminds everyone not to take poison
Federal agents raid gun shop, find weapons
Crack found in man’s buttocks
President wins budget; more lies ahead
Local high school dropouts cut in half
Typhoon rips through cemetery – hundreds dead