I didn’t find Christmas
in shopping malls
in festive tables groaning with food
even in endless parties where
you hear distilled
cocktail laughter
even as children cry for relief
in war and earthquake-ravaged
earth
Strange
I found Christmas
in this indefatigable couple
and in this theater actress
cooking food for the hungry
and the homeless
after midnight inferno
after the earth’s sudden rumblings
and sudden swelling of rivers
after days of rain
I decided
I will try to find Christmas
through silence
in the house
no tv
swelling with stories
of self-proclaimed gods
with kingdoms
reeking of exploited wives
and children
and boys trained
for another state of war
I will try to find Christmas
away from the crowd
and their shopping bags
as they block city streets
even as commuters
grapple with bad traffic
and jeepney drivers
forming a chorus
of street slaves
hoping for relief
from public servants
concerned with fat contracts
than with relieving
the agony of the poor
This was Christmas this year
as children, mothers and fathers die
in the streets of Gaza
I prefer my Christmas quiet
with peace in my heart
after two successive funerals
which left my grandson
coping with
a fatherless
and motherless
Christmas