A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.

 

A psychologist is someone who charged a lot of money to ask you questions that your wife asks for free.

 

A sociologist is someone who, when a beautiful women enters the room, is watching everybody else.

*****

 

ONLY IN THE WESTERN WORLD

 

…can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

…do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.

…do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

…do people leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put useless junk in the garbage.

…do people buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight.

…do people use the word “politics” to describe the process so well: poli in Latin meaning “many” and tics meaning “bloodsucking creatures.”