The first question that we must ask to understand this topic is: What is STRESS?
According to popular understanding, stress can be defined as a state of worry or mental tension caused by a demanding situation. Stress is a natural human response that prompts us to address challenges and threats in our lives. Stress is how we react when we feel under pressure or threatened. It usually happens when we are in a situation that we do not feel we can manage or control.
It arises from any event, thought or anything that can make us angry, nervous, or frustrated. It is a normal thing that can come to us any time of the day. It is our reaction to a challenge and the good news is, it can be positive especially when we instinctively avoid danger and other problems as a natural response to self-protection.
However, stress can be harmful to our health and to our whole life if it lasts for a long time. Worse, it can even affect our mental health and it can lead to far greater problems. Our anxieties, feelings of depression, sleep disorders and even our addictions to drugs and alcohol are signs of our stressful existence.
People at all levels may feel stressed about meeting the deadlines and the due dates of paying our obligations. We may feel so stressed thinking a lot about our unstoppable process of aging and all the fears that it entails. People can even feel so stressed about unnecessary and unknown possibilities that are not worthy of their time. So, it is important to discover what are the common stressors that can cause our minds to go wild.
Well, I understand that stressors can differ among individuals, depending on their situation and background in life. A financial issue is not an issue at all to a person who is living on a hand-to-mouth basis. How can money be an issue to a person who rarely has money in his pockets? Ironically, because financial issues like this can give more headache to a rich man than to a poor one. There are a lot of other stressors, but I only like to focus on those things which we can change like our lifestyle choices and our relational or social priorities. Those other stressors are permanent like some life events (sickness and death) that are normal, and the kind of environment where we are in.
Our lifestyle choices can make us feel so stressed and we are the only one to blame. If a person chooses to live his life far beyond his means, or beyond what he is earning, it will really be a stressful life. So, I believe we must learn how to be satisfied with what we have and live our lives according to our means. I just do not know why there are a lot of people who would always dream of the impossible dream and go crazy when that dream never came.
Our relational or social priorities can also put more stress on our life. Of course, we must accept the fact that we were created as social beings, and so, we need the company of other people around us. But we must also accept the fact that we are all imperfect beings. With this thought in mind, I believe we must also learn to let go of those who only give us daily headaches and accept those people who are ready to accept us as who we really are. There are moments in my life when I really take time to delete people, yes, those toxic people, in my life. I was not created to please them and not even to please anybody else but God.
To overcome stress, we must know our limits because there are things that we cannot do no matter how hard we try. There are things that we cannot change even if we believe in miracles. We also need to be confident that we can do and realize our visions because we will never pursue them if they are not possible. If you can visualize yourself getting through a stressful situation, it is more likely that the stress you are experiencing will not be enough to overwhelm you.
Moving on is also important because we cannot just dwell in our misery. Let us always remember that all storms in life are temporary, so we always need to get moving. We can do this better if we try to shift and re-direct the story of our life. They are just challenges and as my favorite author puts it: “Tough times never last… tough people do!”
Lately, I felt so stressed about so many things. Luckily, I was invited to be a resource speaker about the topic, and preparing for the talk itself helped me realize that I am also undergoing a stressful episode in my life. So, I decided to throw them all away because they are unnecessary burdens which I have carried with me all the time. Moving on is the best decision I have made and, if I found it helpful, doing the same thing can also help you.
The next time you are in a stressful situation, think about what kind of stress you are dealing with right now. Is it distress, or is it a small challenge you know you can overcome that can even give you a taste of that eustress feeling?
One last note, be thankful that stressful moments take place in your life. It is an assurance that you are still alive! Always pray to God, he is our only protector and our strength. Trust in God’s love, for he will never allow anyone who believes in him to lose his life in this stressful world we live in.